Politeness in Finnish

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Please note that we are speaking about an aspect of Finnish language here, we are not discussing whether Finns themselves like to be polite or not. What sounds nice and polite to a Finnish speaker may offend a foreigner, if they translate it literally into their native language. Many words don't have exact counterparts in different languages.

Informal (sinä) or formal (te)?

As in many other languages, there are formal and informal ways of addressing a person in Finnish. But note that they are used differently than in some languages you may already know (less formal than German/French/Russian, but more formal than Swedish).

The formal way is mostly used:

• When speaking to aged people (over 40-60 years, depends on the speaker)
• When speaking to a grown-up client/customer
• When speaking to the president (always) and other politicians of high position
• Sometimes when speaking to neighbors, passers-by, colleagues, your boss etc. (depends on the speaker)
• In official letters and blanks/forms

The informal way is mostly used:

• When speaking to children, family, friends, fellow students (also by teachers)
• By children and people in their early teens (even when speaking to aged people)
• Sometimes when speaking to neighbors, passers-by, colleagues, your boss etc. (depends on the speaker)
• In advertising, instructions, signs etc.
• In chats and forums (because most Internet users are young)

Sounds confusing? Don't worry. It's not easy even for natives, because our society has changed a lot during the last decades, and it's difficult to guess whether someone has modern or traditional values. Many people under 50 feel even insulted if you address them the formal way ("I'm not that old!"), while others think quite the opposite. Luckily in Finnish it's easy to avoid addressing people directly: instead of asking people to do something, tell them what you would like to have. This "trick" you can use with anyone and you'll always sound polite. (It's even more polite than using te, but still never "too polite" to use with friends and family).

How to make a polite request?

In Finnish there is no good translation for the English word please, as in Give me that book, please. So how can you make a polite request? I recommend using the conditional:

Anna minulle tuo kirja. - Give me that book. (This is an order!)
Antaisitko minulle tuon kirjan? - Literally: Could you (informal) give me that book? (This is polite.)
Antaisitteko minulle tuon kirjan? - Literally: Could you (formal) give me that book? (This is polite.)

Or, if you want to avoid choosing between informal and formal:

Saisinko tuon kirjan? - Literally: Could I get that book? (This is polite.)
Voisinko saada tuon kirjan? - Literally: Could I get that book? (This is very polite.)

You can also add kiitos ("thank you"): Saisinko tuon kirjan, kiitos?

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