French grammar: avoir vs. être

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The question of whether to use "avoir" or "être" arises mainly when you want to use the French tenses Passé composé or Plus-que-parfait. Fortunately, there's a step-by-step guide that will make the decision really easy for you:

Is the verb the verb être? - If yes, use avoir.

If not, continue || 

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Is the verb used reflexively in this sentence? - If yes, use être.

 If not, continue || 

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Does the verb have a direct object in this sentence? - If yes, use avoir.

 If not, continue || 

                  ||

Does the verb appear in the following list?

 aller - appaître - arriver - descendre - devenir - entrer - monter - 
 paraître* - partir - passer* - rentrer - rester - retourner - sortir - tomber -
 venir - as well as all composites that retain the meaning 

• only if it means a change of location
  

                   - if yes, use être. 

                   - if not (all other verbs), use avoir.

Examples:
Je me suis lavé. - verb is used reflexively -> être
Alors je me suis dit... - verb is used reflexively -> être
J'ai monté l'escalier. - direct object -> avoir
Tu m'as poussé à l'eau. - direct object -> avoir
Je suis tombé. - verb on the list -> être
­Ça m'a paru drôle. - not used in the sense of a change of location
C'est fini. - no passé composé
Nous sommes battus. - passive sentence (which always uses être)
J'ai couru. - One of the "other verbs" -> avoir